Another Day

Well, it's another no good cycle. I've really never felt so discouraged. I was really, really hoping that this time it would work out - and the due date, incredibly, would have been very close to our son's birthday. And I thought - wouldn't that be funny! And cool! And crazy! And I started making plans. I started thinking about this little girl (because I've decided that we're going to have a girl, yes, I know) . . . that she's going to be really spunky and independent and a wonderful, delightful handful. I started thinking about how I'm going to need to plan for the time off . . . and how we really need to start putting money aside. And then I worried about the Boy and how he would handle it. And then it didn't happen. Again. So, back to clomid. Another round. Another added three million pounds (clomid is not good for my waist line. Either that or I'm just plain eating too much. Obviously it's the clomid). Deep sigh. This is getting ridiculous. Onward and upward!

Oh, Le Sigh

I tested at 9 DPIUI and got a faint positive. I was excited. I was happy. Then I looked at the Boy and felt a little sad at what life is going to be like for him soon - how will he handle a sibling? Will he be OK? Did we make the right decision? Then today, totally negative. Snow white negative. So, probably the HCG was still in my system from the trigger shot but I'm hoping that I still have a chance so I'm going to keep testing. As much as I worried about The Boy, I was totally excited about the prospect of numero dos. So . . . we shall see. Waiting game. As usual.